I feel like Gollum. I haven’t been getting out much on account of Camp NaNoWriMo, so I’m all pale and my hair is stringy, my only company during the day is my hobbit-sized son and I’m OBSESSED with my precious. Not the one ring to rule them all, but my novel. All the time I devote to thinking on, talking about and, of course, writing my novel, is making me crazy.
Which is fine by me. See having a creative brain can feel like insanity. It is crazy to have make-believe people and imaginary worlds in your head and the longer we fight to lock them away or ignore them, the harder those characters and ideas fight to get out. I’m treating my particular case with heavy doses of writing. I pour all of my crazy out on the page, so that my brain can have a break from the constant hammering of ideas. It’s like popping in a cough drop to cure a sore throat. It does nothing to cure the overall condition, but it does offer some blessed, albeit temporary relief.
But none of that explains why I haven’t posted anything in over a week. I’m behind on my goal and I had a few days there where I struggled to find the words. See writing is also communication and the challenge is to take these amazing movies that we see in our heads and describe them in such a way that others can see them. This is a great plan in theory, but when I’m writing my rough draft this is rarely the case. I envision Empire Strikes Back, but I end up writing Phantom Menace.
Now when this happens, I’m tempted to throw my computer against a wall and call it a day but, while that would feel amazing, that is not how novels get written. Also, eventually the crazy of creativity will return and then it’s back to square one. No, the only real solution is to let your Empire Strikes Back be Phantom Menace. Let it be crap.
I get to the point eventually where I just throw it all out there. As Hemingway put it, bleed. Naturally this can be painful, particularly when I read through what I’ve written. I cope by leaving comments for Future Hayley like “make this suck less.” And sometimes I will write a paragraph from a new angle to see if second take is better, but I don’t delete anything.
As mentioned, writer me is nuts and what Present Hayley thinks is crap, Future Hayley might appreciate. And there is nothing worse than knowing you’ve already written the perfect words to describe something and those words are gone because Past You was a jerk and deleted them.
So, I hope this ranty rant is of the sense-making variety and if you don’t hear from me much this month or I don’t post anything for awhile, check the Misty Mountains.
Total Words Written in July: 14,788
Goal for this point: 18,387
Manuscript total: 82,101
How I feel about writing today
Now I want to hear from you! How is your writing (or reading) going? Rate it either Phantom Menace (sucktastic), Empire (you seek Muppet guidance), Jedi (fun and space bears) or A New Hope (ALL OF THE AWESOME).
I have been very fortunate as of late to be nominated for not one but three ‘Very Inspiring Blogger Awards.’ Of which I have procrastinated responding to…until now (yes, you are supposed to read that last part in the Christian Bale Batman voice. You know me so well.) Instead of responding to each of these awesome awards individually, I will combine them and make THE MEGA-AWESOME SUPER INSPIRING VOLTRON AWARD. If you’re too young for the Voltron reference, think Power Rangers.
Let’s begin. So first off, a HUGE thank you to the amazing bloggers that nominated me Serins Sphere, Shannon A. Thompson, and Callum McLaughlin. Serins and Callum are two amazing authors in the making. They write fiction and poetry. Shannon is the published author of Minutes Before Sunset. All three of these amazing bloggers post content that you need to read and follow and comment on regularly. Seriously, what have you been doing with your life. If you’re not already, you should go and visit their pages now, stalk them and return to share all their secrets with me.
Go on. This post will still be here when you get back. I can wait.
*Some time later…*
Yay! You’re back! I missed you! Now where were we? Ah yes, THE MEGA-AWESOME SUPER INSPIRING VOLTRON AWARD! But first before we dive into this wacky barrel of fun, the rules. You didn’t think we were going to just jump into this thing all willy nilly did you? For the record I am neither willy or nilly or Milly Vanilli (I seriously need to come up with some references from this decade).
The Rules (They’re really more like guidelines. You don’t even have to follow them. I won’t tell anyone)
- Thank and link the amazing person(s) who nominated you.
- List the rules and display the award.
- Share seven facts about yourself.
- Nominate 15 other amazing blogs and comment on their posts to let them know they have been nominated.
- Optional: Proudly display the award logo on your blog and follow the blogger who nominated you. (I made a special one just for you!)
Now I’m supposed to list 7 facts about myself. Here goes!
- I met my best friend 17 years ago in high school. She was crying in a bathroom stall because a friend of hers bailed on her. I told her she could come hang out with me is she wanted to and we’ve been friends ever since.
- I love horror movies!
- I’m a military brat.
- I call my son Bean, sometimes Bean Machine.
- I was named after actress Hayley Mills. My mother narrowed it down to the name of the actress or the name of the character she played, Pollyanna. I’m glad she went with the actress’s name.
- My favorite movie is True Romance.
- The first books I ever fangirled over were the Beatrix Potter books when I was really little.
That was tough! Glad I did these all together because there is no way I could have come up with 21 facts about myself. Now for the fun part, I get to nominate 15 blogs that have inspired me. I’m sure I will inevitably nominate someone who has already received the award. In any case, there is no pressure to accept the award or if you’ve already received a Very Inspiring Blogger award, yoink the MEGA AWESOME SUPER INSPIRING VOLTRON AWARD for a little extra bling for your blog.
Here are my nominees:
- She Reads She Blogs: Jackie hosts the best book giveaways and I love her reviews. Her reaction gifs at the end of her reviews are hilarious and were the inspiration for my “how I feel about writing” gifs at the end of my nano posts.
- Caught Read Handed: Stefani has amazing productivity. On of top reading and creating great content for her page, she also contributes reviews to WatchPlayRead and, if I remember correctly, is starting two new jobs.
- Confessions of a Book Geek: Rachel hosts fantastic giveaways, reads a ton and posts great content. I can always count on her to introduce me to great new books!
- Coffee. Write. Repeat: Victoria’s dedication and passion for writing is always inspiring.
- Natacha Guyot: One of my favorite science fiction bloggers. She posts about great topics and shares my love of Buffy. She’s also a very supportive blogger and always leaves great comments.
- PERMASHIFT: Sierra is hilarious. She tells it how it is and her posts are always entertaining and insightful.
- Sarah J. Carlson: I love how cultured Sarah is. Her blog has introduced me to new parts of the world. She is always on the move and seeking adventure.
- booknerderie: I love her book reviews. Short, sweet and funny. She also has already met her goal of reading 100 books this year!
- Kathryn St. John-Shin: Kathryn juggles a busy life but she remains dedicated to her pursuits as a mother, writer and fitness instructor.
- The Crazy Nerds: I love Christian’s comics and his productivity amazes me! He is also very well-read and always has interesting things to say.
- A Writer’s Life for Me: Miska released not one but three novels this year! Amazing!
- A Well-Read Woman: April is my go-to source for women’s fiction. She always has fantastic recommendations!
- Winter Bayne: One of the most supportive and active members of the WordPress community you will ever meet and a very dedicated and productive writer.
- Callum McLaughlin: So Callum nominated me but he is truly one of the most inspiring bloggers I know so I’m nominating him back! (Take that Callum). He’s already received this award and for good reason: he is incredibly passionate about writing and you can’t help but feel inspired to write all the words after reading his posts.
- Often Clueless, Always Shoeless: Olivia’s posts are always fun and exciting. This month she has challenged herself to write one short story a day: creative and awesome!
There! I did it! Wow, that was a long post. If you’ve made it to the end, huge thanks to you! *blog five*